Youth &
Family Support
Awareness of the
biological differences between boys and girls normally occurs by the
age of three. Transgendered youth face tremendous difficulties in a
society where heterosexuality often seems the only acceptable
orientation. Homosexuality & transsexuality are often regarded as
deviant and variation from cultural concepts of "normal gender" often
evokes hostility or violence. Regarding gender identity—a person's
innate sense of maleness or femaleness—transgendered people report
experiencing conflict over their gender assignment throughout childhood
and adolescence. Often, after coming out to their family or being
discovered, many transgender & intersex youth are thrown out of
their home, mistreated, or made the focus of their family's dysfunction.
Research shows that transphobia greatly contributes to high rates of
attempted and completed suicide, violence, victimisation, substance
abuse, teenage pregnancy, and HIV-associated risky behaviour in
transgender & intersex youth. However, Freedom aims to offer transgender &
intersex youth the skills and support they need to develop into healthy
adults.
The
difference between intersex and transgender
Broadly speaking, for
transgender people, the issue is about a person’s gender identity, while
in intersex people; the issue is about a person’s sex anatomy. Most
transgender people are born with “standard” male or female anatomy, but
some are born with intersex conditions. The majority of people with
intersex conditions do NOT identify as transgender, because their gender
identities remain constant throughout their lives. However, some people
with intersex conditions who were assigned the wrong gender by doctors
at birth also undergo a gender transition later in life. Another
difference is that many intersex advocates seek to stop “surgical
normalisation” procedures, which are performed on many intersex people
without their consent. Those who lack standard-male and standard-female
genitalia or internal reproductive anatomy are often subjected to these
procedures from infancy to adolescence, which sometimes cause the loss
of sexual response in adulthood. Freedom
believes that the biggest problem people with intersex conditions and
their families face are enforced shame and secrecy.
Risks
Faced by Transgendered Youth
When a transgendered youth
comes out, the ability to pass in their new gender is usually limited.
Hormonal therapy can take years to produce a passable appearance,
especially with male-to-female transgendered people, and some may never
pass completely. Thus, those in gender transition are often readily
apparent to others, and they are at risk from discrimination and
violence. Transgendered youth are especially vulnerable to harassment
and violence in their schools, not only from their fellow students, but
also from intolerant teachers. As a result, many drop out of school to
escape the hostility and insensitivity. Transgendered youth often feel
that their true gender identity is crucial to the survival of self. If
their parents refuse to accept their child’s inherent gender or if their
families and friends withhold support, these youths incur the same
risks faced by gay and lesbian youth with non-accepting families. Some
may run away from home and live on the streets, or they may seek to
escape the pain of their lives through substance abuse. Like gay and
lesbian youth, transgendered youth are also at higher risk from suicide.
Parenting
tips
A family’s response to their
child’s gender-variant behaviours or cross-gender identity can vary
greatly and depend upon a number of factors. If a child conceals their
inherent cross gender identity, the parents may never know of their
internal struggle. Parents of children with gender-variant behaviours or
recognisable cross-gender identities may choose to support their
children or insist they conform to gender norms associated with their
birth sex. While cultural and faith-based beliefs are powerful
influences on parental attitudes towards these children, a simple lack
of experience and access to alternative information are often powerful
underlying factors. Parenting a teenager is obviously a challenge at the
simplest of times but parenting a teen transitioning to another gender
can be overwhelming. While there’s been a tremendous evolution in
support for parents of gay and lesbian youth, families dealing with the
unique needs of transgender & intersex youth often feel helpless and
alone. Many parents have feelings of guilt or shame; it’s a very
confusing time for them. Trust yourself and your child; you’ve done
nothing wrong. Children don’t always have the words to “TELL” you that
they are transgender or gender variant. Pay more attention to their cues
and behaviours. You and your child will know best. Accept where you and
your child are now. You didn’t cause this and you can’t change it.
Difference isn’t wrong…. it just is. You didn’t “decide” what your
gender was, you just knew. Your child didn’t decide either, he/she just
knows. There is nothing as meaningful to a gender variant child than the
support and acceptance of family, friends, teachers and the community.
Confidence and knowledge are essential. Viewing your child’s condition
as a blessing and celebrating your child as one of your greatest gifts
will bolster your child’s confidence and self esteem, as well as setting
an example for others to view your child in the same light. Confidence
and knowledge equal power. Treatment is available. Making informed
decisions to medically intervene at appropriate intervals may be
essential to your child’s mental health and well-being. Investigate the
possibilities and don’t put off making decisions out of fear or denial.
Seek support and/or therapy if you, your child or your family is
struggling to accept your child’s gender expression. Nurture yourself,
your child, and the rest of your family physically and mentally during
this journey. Remember, Freedom
is here for you too.
Mentoring
Should you require
help, advice or Mentoring* please contact our dedicated Youth Team, who
will be happy to help.
Email:
freedom@freedom.zzn.com
* A mentor is here to help
the mentee to believe in themself and boost their confidence. A mentor
is here to ask questions and challenge, while providing guidance and
encouragement. Mentoring allows the mentee to explore new ideas in
confidence. It is a chance to look more closely at yourself, your
issues, opportunities and what you want in life. Mentoring is about
becoming more self aware, taking responsibility for your life and
directing your life in the direction you decide, rather than leaving it
to chance.
Search Engine Optimization
and SEO Tools